Goodbyes...

Goodbyes are always hard ain’t it? I wonder why though… People come and go from your life all the time…one would think you’d be used to it by now. When you’re young, it’s one thing to believe that friends will last forever. As you grow up however, you realize that’s not the case always. Best friends will have their own life too later on, and you won’t be the center of attention (everyone wants to be the center of attention, :P well maybe not everybody :D ). You learn to move on as time passes on, so why again is it so difficult to say goodbye to begin a new chapter on life? It’s a conundrum.

Goodbyes are a must however… so I guess I might as well muster up all the emotions and give it a proper close.

I had been preparing to say goodbye for a long long time. It’s not like that I thought it would be really easy but I hadn’t thought that it would be really that hard either. When I finally broke the news, which happened sporadically by the way because I had been postponing every day to break it to them, I was totally taken off-guard by the reaction. I knew this would shock them for one and would also leave them at a awkward position….that was the main reason of me delaying the breaking of the news. But however I thought this would be a perfect time to tell …rather than let them carry on and think that I’d be staying there longer and plan for the future. So I explained to them and thought I had fully answered all their questions too but I was even more taken by surprise when I got the one on one talk for an hour. I was speechless…I felt really bad. I mean I was at a loss for words, I just listened on. These people are like my family!! I take their opinions very seriously and with all the emotions out there…I really didn’t know what to say at all. And even now, if I think about it…I get this feeling of deep sadness. It really was a bad timing on my part…but one can never predict things in life. Things happen at the worst of times right? I have been thinking about it for a long time and I had made the decision that would be best for me…and I would miss everyone greatly. I truly have learned a lot from them and they’re one of the best of people I have ever met in my life. I have very high regards for them.

I can remember the first day, as anyone can tell from the moment they talk with me…they’ll say I am not much of a talker…very true in fact. I remember one of my friends in high school saying that I look so serious and non-approachable. :D (I won’t argue with that either!! :P ). It takes me a really, really long time to open up to people and talk. It has always been like that…unless with those random people who are really talkative. With some people it’s like hitting the right chords with them you know?...I can talk on and on forever at the first time I meet them. Most of the time however, it’s not the case and I remember here…it took me almost a year perhaps for me to talk a lot have long conversations about “nothing” in particular. I love the talks on ‘nothing’!! :-D There is just this incredibly irresistible charm on that topic…what can I say? :-D

So, after three years of working…I have gotten close to people and I have learned a lot on the process as well. They are a very nice group of people...very helpful, caring and kind, etc. They are never shy on sharing their knowledge…and they are always there to listen to your ideas. They have an open mind and they never put you down. I have heard quite a lot from friends while in school, on how horrible jobs were out there…but luckily my first experience was just so wonderful. It was nothing like what they had described…for instance of discrimination, bosses treating you as nothing, never listening to you…how you’re like a speck of sand in the desert in big companies and such. I hope to not encounter such things but I guess eventually I will encounter those instances as I move on in life…

Here…I loved the people I had the chance to work with. They truly are great colleagues and great friends but life must go on…and things change and so do I have to make my decisions accordingly for the better or for the worst (hopefully for the better :-D …but challenges are always out there to keep life entertaining isn’t it? :P). These past few days, I have been thinking a lot… reminiscing as well. I wonder why when it’s time to say goodbye … you think of all the wonderful moments!! And then again… there’s that tinge of sadness knocking at the door…I have thought quite a bit and still no words of closure have formed in my mind.