Why is it that sometimes you have no desire to talk to anyone? No desire to pick up the phone and say hello...no desire to dial the number...no desire to drop a line...
Is that being selfish? ... wanting to be left alone?
Is that being depressed? (If so, why?)
Why do people come to the conclusion that if you don't want to talk, you are depressed? Can't one just want to be alone to think or do something? Isn't the best work done, when you are left alone?? For example, coming up with a brilliant idea while taking a shower!! Eureka!!! (Not that I have had that happening :P but that's how it is... you think outside the box if you have this luxury of peace and quiet sometimes. Of course I am not saying this happens all the time because many ideas can be formed during times when you bounce ideas from here to there.)
Maybe all I needed was some peace and quiet...without being hounded by anyone querying me of my unusual habits (I wouldn't say this is very unusual in my case tho :P I like to have my own space...to be in the zone!!)
Why do I feel as if I am bombarded with phone calls? I just lose words sometimes...as if everything I have wanted to say has already been said and there is nothing left to say anymore. It's not like it would never come, I mean there's million and one things to talk about...it will come when it will.
Of course calls doesn't necessarily mean that you have to have something to talk about, but it's a PHONE...if you don't talk through it then why are you going to just hold on to it? It's not like being there in person... In person at least if you have nothing to say, you can do other things...there are plenty of options. People calling and having nothing to talk about means a rather awkward silence... If that was going to be so...isn't it better to have not called? or picked up?
Consider a video conference with your friend, now what would it be like if both of you had nothing to say... That's pretty awkward :S I woudn't be fond of standing in front of a camera saying nothing :P I am not much of a talker really unless there is something to talk about of course... :D
Another thing with me is that...if someone calls and I have nothing to say and they have nothing to say....I start getting irritated. Having a conversation should be something natural...something liberating in a way because it should take your frustrations out. It's casual moments where you chill, one should not find it a stressful thing.
What do you do when you can't write when you try to write? You wait for the next day when you're in the mood. That's how everything is...there's a flow to all things you do. You may not recognize it but there's always a flow to everything that's happening. Sometimes you line up with other people's flow and everything seems to go smoothly and sometimes you take a different path of flow and be distant to the original flow of things. That shouldn't mean that something is wrong with you though. Maybe it would seem rude and selfish even to not consider others but is it truly wrong? Wrong to be yourself?
If things you did for fun became like a chore...why would you even want to do anything right? There are plenty of things in the world where you do things because you have to do it. Somethings...should be done for YOU only... The ability to choose is the freedom you have... If there was no options on some little things, I wonder how everyone would be...
The facade of freedom? At the end...is everything being controlled?.
4 comments:
is that why u dont pick up the phone????...just kidding before u get all mad at a stranger...well..i feel like never anwering the god damn cell phone..never lets me enjoy my privacy :(
stranger huh?
that nick I remember...are you the same person that I am thinking of? or are ya really a stranger?
U mean that dukulathak thats been in and around the cyber world ? If this is the case, yes I am the culprit who has been using this nick for a while :)
thought that nick rang a bell :-)
how goes your life? Hope all's well!!
happy new year 08 !!
:-)
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